Grace. His grace abounds, and I see His character in people around. I didn’t deserve to feel good tonight, I thought. My son, who is almost 5 feet tall, pushed a two year old child down on concrete.
My son has autism.
Probably this week there will be another diagnosis of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. He picks at his hands, hurts himself over numbers he hears, is terrified of cats and dogs…. Anxiety builds up so much that it takes him hours to calm down.
My son’s name is John. His name means gracious gift from God.
I experienced grace this evening after we apologized to the mother of the little boy my son pushed down. One of John’s teachers was standing by and said, “Hey, you have a good week.”
I didn’t even realize he was there. I was too busy being mortified that my son hurt another person- a little 2 year old who was minding his own business. My focus was on the sadness of the mother’s face.
We came home and John wrote a letter to the little boy and his mother. I wrote one, too. I felt so bad that my son would hurt her son. A mother often views her child as an extension of herself. When that child is hurt, she hurts too.
This got me to thinking about her, and I felt tormented. I wished it had never happened. And then God sent me grace.
The same teacher that told me to have a good week text messaged me later. He let me know that they were modifying John’s curriculum, praying for John, and hoping that he was feeling better.
Grace. He gave John and our family grace. He let me know that we were still invited to come back to this program. I didn’t feel we deserved it. Someone got hurt tonight.
And then more grace when I realized that the way I view John as an extension of myself is how God views me as an extension of Himself. I am His child.
Thank you God for loving me when I feel I don’t deserve it. Thank you for people who care for my son and light up my life.
Jeremiah 31:25: For I will satisfy the weary soul and every languishing soul I will replenish.